Rivalries
The Miliband brothers, David Miliband and Ed Miliband of England, were front ranking leaders of the Labour Party. Both were recognized as young leaders of the future – dynamic, charming and with experience in administration. David being the elder was widely expected to take over the leadership of the party. But in the party election held in 2010, Ed upstaged his elder brother and bagged the leadership. And how did David react to the shock choice? He just quit. Not only politics, but his country altogether and moved to America where he will be separated from his brother by the Atlantic Ocean!
Most of us may have grown up through the experience of sibling rivalry in the early days of our life? Haven’t I felt bad when my elder brother tried to show that he was smarter, by clicking his fingers and whistling with lips? – Things that I could not yet do. For the elders who watch their children in sibling rivalry, it can be fun. But some children end up as life-long victims of hurts of shame and inferiority resulting from it. Even as young adults, don’t we compare ourselves with our siblings and become painfully aware that I am not as intelligent as her?, I am not as efficient as her?, I am not as popular as her?
Sibling rivalry is not a phenomenon unique to our times. In fact, it is as old as human race itself. Bible abounds in stories of strife, cheating and all-consuming jealousy among siblings in the family. The story of Esau and Jacob born to Isaac and Rebecca is a classic example. Here the rivalry begins even before they are born. The womb of the mother becomes literally a battleground for the yet to be born twins. Jacob cannot reconcile to the fact that he is not going to be the firstborn. First he tries to block Esau from being born first. With no success in that, thereafter he tries every trick to deprive his brother of his natural rights of the firstborn. The Book of Genesis is home to beautiful narratives of the plots of deception that Jacob plans against his brother. Subsequently, we also get to see how the deceptions he plotted against his brother come back to haunt him later in his life.
John the Baptist and Jesus are cousins. Not only by blood, but also bond. See, it was the thought of lending a helping hand to Elizabeth that engages Mary when the former was pregnant with John. When they met, how the cousin babes in the womb bonded!
Both are born and are named John and Jesus. John is the elder, born a few months before his cousin. They grow up together. More than the family bond, the vision of life binds them together. Certainly, it is the elder cousin who is more radical in following a religious life-style. Jesus is more of a commoner. By his radical bend, John scores over his cousin. Was it not Jesus who testified that “John the Baptist is greater than any man who has ever lived?” (Mt 11:11).
For John the Baptist then, things were not clear like black and white as perhaps they are for us today. True, a sense of being chosen guided him. And his commitment to his call was total. But what sort of a mission God had intended for his younger cousin was something he did not even vaguely know. When Jesus walked up to him for baptism, John saw signs indicative of God’s special designs for his cousin. But doubts were far from cleared from John’s mind. Even just days and weeks away from his death, John is desperately sending his disciples to Jesus as if the last thing he wanted to do before his death was to know for sure who his cousin indeed was: “Are you the one who is going to come, or should we expect someone else?” (Mt 11:3).
Over the time both John the Baptist and Jesus grew up to be Masters. Both had their own band of ardent followers. Both preached the coming of the Kingdom. Apart from these, there was nothing in common between the two. They were worlds apart in lifestyles. Jesus with his wonder working skills was certainly more popular. But for John’s disciples, Jesus’ credibility was suspect. To them, he even seemed fake. Unlike their master, Jesus did not fast and was seen by some as a glutton. So naturally they take objection to Jesus baptizing people.
John was human and all too human. The more he observed Jesus, the more he was confused. And worse, his own band of supporters daily brought him some stories aimed at driving a wedge between him and his cousin Jesus. In turn, John did not turn to himself to count own merits. The light can come not from within, nor from around, but from above. He resolves to live by the sign from above he witnessed as he baptized Jesus; the dove descending on Jesus. ‘We may be from the same family; I may be the elder; people may speak of me more approvingly. Yet, he is the designated one. That is the heaven’s choice.’ Hence John chooses to be open to the truth and live by the truth. “Jesus ranks ahead of me,” says he as we heard in the Gospel today.
How many families do we see around us choosing self-destruction through division within themselves? Brother against brother; sister against sister; brother against sister. What is it that turns me against my brother? I feel that my brother was privileged when my father divided the property; I rebel at the thought that I have to bear the burden of caring for my sick parents; I can’t bear the shame when people compare me with my brother who is far ahead of me on every scale.
Let us learn from John the Baptist. Turning to me and comparing me with my brother would mean that I choose a life of counting what I miss in my life. That reduces me to simmering jealousy and hatred and self-contempt. Look to the heavens, says the Baptist. See the heaven’s choice - for me and for my brother. Embrace it with trust and gratitude. Then I will see springs of energy and joy welling up within me. That will set me on a path where I can count blessings after blessings.
Dr George Kulangara CMI
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